Embroidered "I Am Way Cooler Than My Nonexistent Dating Profile" Crewneck Sweatshirt
Slip this embroidered crewneck on and let a little dry humor do the talking. Soft, midweight, and built to hold its shape, the sweatshirt carries a stitched line — “i am way cooler than my nonexistent dating profile” — that reads like a wink. Wear it on slow Sunday mornings, at a low-key house party, or tucked under a jacket for a coffee run. The subtle left- or center-chest placement keeps the message casually confident, while the option for wrist embroidery adds a playful, secret detail. It’s for the person who enjoys sardonic charm and comfortable layers that last.
Product features
- Midweight 50/50 cotton-poly blend (8.0 oz/yd²) for comfort and durability
- Embroidered slogan available on left chest, center chest, large center chest, and optional wrist placements
- Tubular knit (no side seams) and ribbed collar to retain shape and reduce fabric waste
- Double-needle stitched seams and pearlized tear-away label for itch-free wear
- Made in Nicaragua with OEKO-TEX® certified dyes and US Cotton Trust Protocol-supported cotton
Care instructions
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Do not dryclean
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | 4XL | 5XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width, in | 20.00 | 22.01 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 | 30.00 | 32.00 | 34.00 |
| Length, in | 27.00 | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 | 34.00 |
| Sleeve length (from center back), in | 33.50 | 34.50 | 35.50 | 36.50 | 37.50 | 38.50 | 39.50 | 40.50 |
| Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
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Without side seams
Knit in one piece using tubular knit, it reduces fabric waste and makes the garment more attractive
Ribbed knit collar with seam
Ribbed knit makes the collar highly elastic and helps retain its shape
Embroidery
Embroidery decoration method available on either left chest, center chest, or large center chest, as well as right + left wrists
Age restrictions
For adults
Other compliance information
Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalates level requirements.
Country of origin
Made in Nicaragua
DTF inner neck labels
The inner neck labels and wrist prints are printed using the Direct-to-Film (DTF) print method, while the rest of the prints are done with the Direct-to-Garment (DTG) method.
; Do not dryclean; Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F); Non-chlorine: bleach as needed; Tumble dry: low heat.
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Any goods purchased can only be returned in accordance with the Terms and Conditions and Returns Policy.
We want to make sure that you are satisfied with your order and we are committed to making things right in case of any issues. We will provide a solution in cases of any defects if you contact us within 30 days of receiving your order.
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